Under the harvest moon

A little wave blew through today, and I could almost smell the ocean, hear the waves breaking on a rocky shore, feel the familiar path beneath my feet. Followed immediately by a wash of homesickness and longing for what is gone forever. Back when I still believed in the safety and haven of a small hometown, and the idea that heroes might still exist – even if they would never, could never see me.

Someday I hope I can move out of the city again, live somewhere quiet and peaceful near water – the only place I can truly feel at ease and home at last. Oh god I miss it though, can barely express it in words how much it hurts sometimes. Remembering how that time was like having my heart ripped out over and over for years. Trauma after trauma until I didn’t feel like me at all, just a shivering, over medicated wreck of a human who was stuck in some dark hell while pretending everything was normal and fine. It was so hard to break the habits of that lifetime, and so many people thought it wasn’t possible, would never happen. Now here I am, completely different, scar tissue over the worst of it and on a totally different path. Thank fucking god/goddess.

Love to all


Cough Syrup – Young The Giant
Swept Away – Diana Ross
Superstition – Stevie Wonder
Brother – NeedtoBreathe
Forget Me Nots – Patrice Rushen
Didn’t It Rain – Evelyn Freeman
We Don’t Talk Anymore – Cliff Richard
In My Dreams – Berlin
Drowning In The Sea Of Love – The Adventures
Cheap Thrills – Sia
Shadow Of The Day – Linkin Park
You Don’t Know Love – Olly Murs
Much Too Young- Garth Brooks
The Radio – Vince Gill

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