The secret plan

One of the best benefits to working in health care is never knowing what your day is actually going to be like. I’ve seen nervous breakdowns, screaming, new babies, floods, deaths, pest infestations, cheating, fire, love, hate – and those were mostly just in our office.

The joy that comes from mastering the skills to calmly manage all these things, it can’t be bought. It’s been an interesting and humbling place to work. But when they got rid of my temp employee and more than doubled my work load, I knew I wasn’t going to make it very long. I held out a long time, did a bunch of overtime, but that is the craziest office I’ve ever worked in. Although I’m glad to help and bring a little zen and love to the chaos, I am fully broken and fully burned out. I thought I could power through, but recent events pretty much crippled what was left of my faith in our team, and I’m ready to move into a new challenge.

It’s all I can do to go in to work every day now. I’m not one to just quit or walk away without something lined up, but oh my goodness this time I wish I could. Some days I don’t even have time to take a bathroom break, and I’m too exhausted and sad after work to even think about the classes I want to take. Kind of challenging to move into something else, and that sucks because I think I finally have a plan.

Since there’s such a need for it, I think I want to become a licensed counselor. It’s quicker and easier than art or garden therapy degrees, but it still soothes my soul’s need to pursue work that maybe can help. I’m not sure how I can manage the school part, but it gives me renewed hope to finally have an idea of what I want to do next.

The Seven Year Ache – Rosanne Cash

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